By Ronnie Freedman, Ph.D.

“Know thyself”
Plato

How do you define yourself? Who are you and what do you want out of life? Do your choices and decisions reflect the “true” you or are they merely a mirror of the rest of the crowd and so called popular trends of the day? In order to feel comfortable with yourself, and in your life,  it is essential to achieve complete self-understanding. By doing so, you are able to reinvent yourself by tapping into the real you, the you who really matters.

It’s time to stop masquerading as the person you believe you need to be and become who you really are, the person who owns valid choices, solid decisions, and comfortable likes and dislikes.

Take a moment and think about the following questions:

What is your style and how does it define you?
Are you creating a look that presents the “true” you to the world or are you merely following the trends  you believe are popular at this time. Your style tells the world who you are and represents the side of you that is proud to be you. Take the time to find your own style and stand by it. It’s your signature and  you should be proud of it.

What does your environment state about you?
Does it reflect who you are and what make you comfortable. Does it bring you peace of mind and elicit inner joy? If it does not, it’s time to recreate your space and turn it into one that is geared towards your personality.

What do your interests say about you?
Do you prefer to quietly read a book or listen to your favorite music rather than immerse yourself in a more active, social type of situation? Either way, it’s your choice. It’s what feels good to you and your decision. If you’re  uncomfortable most of the time, it might mean you are going along with the crowd and making less and less of your own decisions. Take your time before making your next decision and opt for the choice that suits you.

Are you stating your opinions or saying “yes” to gain approval?
Too often one goes along with the crowd, rather than stand out as being disagreeable. You feel good in the moment but struggle with odd feelings of anxiety later on. This is your body telling you that you are not being true to yourself. It might be time to take a risk, be yourself and live with peace of mind.

Are you the star of your own life or merely a supporting character?
If you are always being helpful to everyone else in your life, besides yourself, you might be sacrificing what is left of YOU as a person. Everyone else is thrilled and you are walking around feeling hollow. It’s time to become the main character in your life and this is achieved by knowing who you are and standing by your beliefs, your decisions, your interests and your opinions. Others will respect you and will gain self respect.

Remember, your choices are VALID, your opinions COUNT, and your interests are IMPORTANT.

We all go around once in this life so make this ride the best one yet. It is your responsibility to yourself to do so. No one but you has the ability to achieve a life designed personally for your happiness. You owe it to yourself to take stock of your life and recreate it to suit you, in every way possible. You need to excavate your true self in order to achieve this. You need to know yourself in a very clear way, and stand by your choices.

Life is meant to be enjoyed. Confidence is built upon your ability to  remain true to yourself. Learn to reacquaint yourself with the person you truly are, and by doing so you will ensure a life that is comfortable, real and constructed on a strong foundation. It will be the life you designed, you control and a life that genuinely reflects who you are as a person.